school never dies.

School: by definition is never over, never gives up, always has something to say to you, and follows you around like a pesky mosquito wanting a bite of your flesh.

In counting, camp produced 66 mosquito bites just on my two legs. I did not dare even explore the rest of my poor body for fear of the number system running out of numbers with which to label my lovely swollen polka dots. So, I decided since we are obviously good friends, I should refer to them with a much more endearing term than "those dang nasty bug bites that itch so much I just want to put myself through a paper shredder". Polka dots work.

Back to school. I have just embarked upon the AP summer reading list. Although, I love to read, history in particular, American history is not the most interesting. I found the most interesting book that I could about an epic rescue mission of POWs during WWII. Sounds interesting...all 600 pages of it. Furthermore, a report sounded even more enticing to my mystery teacher. Luckily for my literature-hungry self, a few good books are in the running for my AP Literature summer musings. quite good, quite good.

Whatever, as long as I am not doing Algebra, Trigonometry, or PreCalculus, I shall not complain.

Life has been good to me these fast few weeks. Although some rough patches have come up I am finding sleeping late, friends forever, pools, lakes, tans, and super (unstressed) family nights more enjoyable than normal.

Today was my parents anniversary. It was so cute, and the letters that they wrote each other were so romantic. Not necessarily a novel, but incredibly endearing. Something about a stable relationship between one's parents causes the individual to be more confident in themselves. I am finding this confidence quite enjoyable. So, Dad cooked Mom a wonderful dinner with state-of-the-art ribs and the most colorful assortment of grilled peppers and vegetables I have ever seen. Most nights, my parents double-team it and cook a fabulous dinner. Tonight seemed more delectable than usual; probably because of the romanticesque day.

After dinner, to "continue" their romantic night, which happened to include me, they decided to embark on exercise. I mean, why break schedule for a special day? My mom and my dad go bike riding together about three nights a week, which is pretty good considering they both have full time jobs and two children. It was quite refreshing. They have found a wonderful park with a trail that goes for miles. We only rode about ten miles and decided to go home.

mmhm. Key Lime Pie came next. Normally, I cook desserts, and this pie would not normally be of my choosing, so trying something new was a delightful change.

These past few days have been filled with very few phone calls and text messages. This upset me at first, but I have come to enjoy my family more than usual these past few days, and a break from friends for a while is not the worst thing that has ever happened to me. I can breathe now. I feel recharged, refreshed, and ready to start responding to my school work.

Goodnight, world.
Goodnight, invisible friends with absent opinions.
its alright.
Dream well. its summer.

quite frankly,

I think that as a general rule of thumb people blog whenever the feel the need to express their emotions, opinions, and thoughts. Currently, I don't necessarily have the creative inclination inside of me or any certain thought I feel the need to share. Actually, have no desire to be on the computer at all right now. I think I am bored and quite confused with life, and decided to turn to here for a change. I know that all of this cyber-journaling is not going to change anything, but instead give me written affirmation that what I am feeling is true and justifiable.

Today's theme comes from both the Bible and one of the most brilliant poetic minds in the seventeenth century: Love.

As Sir Walter Raleigh put it so well,

"Love is work on holiday, love is December matched with May."

As I grow more and more and experience more circumstances this crazy world produces I realize how much truth really is spoken in those words. It's all bittersweet.

The Bible puts it in different words, but as one experiences love as described by the New Testament, Sir Raleigh's poem comes to life.

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude,
it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps not record of wrongs. Love does not deligh in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perserveres. Love never fails."
-1 Corinthians 13:4-8a

Loving is harder than I ever expected, and I am not necessarily just referring to the romantic kind of love. Although, our world is romantic at heart. I know that I am slowly learning what it means to love and to be loved purely. It is an interesting road to travel, but one that is necessary. I know that I am not alone, and that is comforting.

delenda

Welcome.

[Refer to title] - In the end, I believe that this blog comes down to things to be deleted; blotted out from cyberspace but still exist in my mind. The truths that are found and instilled within ones' memory are much more reliable than the precarious state of this site. However, as a way to vent to...mostly myself, I have created this site on a whim. It was a serendipitous moment when I decided to make my thoughts available for the surrounding population to experience; whether people actually choose to engage with them or not.


Currently in my life I am experimenting with the idea of hope. In this world, hope varies. Whether it is in...
1. no hope
2. little hope
3. false hope
4. dynamic hope
5. unreliable hope
...people believe in hope. The degree is different, yet it still exists.



Personally, I have huge hope for the present and for the future. Although, I have hope in many things, I have found to have hope for just a future; a future fit to have an article placed in front of it. Believing in a personalized future that is better than my current dreams is sometimes hard to completely believe. I know it exists, but surrendering full control and influence over it is a wrestling point for me.

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD.
Plans to prosper you, and not to harm you; plans for hope and a future."
-Jeremiah 29:11

So far my dreams have taken me places I never knew that I could even go. I find the purest joy and the purest thoughts within these dreams. They take me through life, and through them I have learned that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. This is a good place to be at in my life; very bittersweet. Hopes that I want to hold onto I should let go of, and those dreams that I want to let go of I should hold onto.

Good night world, hopeful world.
I hope that you dream well.
Enjoy the summer weather for me tomorrow.

-till next time,
Chelsea Renee